Someone once cut down a tree on Kinderkermack Road in Bergen County and caused me to wander aimlessly through back streets for over an hour. For several years that big evergreen had been my landmark turning point on my way to my daughter’s house.
That was long before GPS when many of us were landmark travelers. In fact, that day when I finally turned into my daughter’s driveway, three following cars stopped at the curb and three old drivers glared at me. I guess they’d also been confused by the tree removal and hoped I might be headed for the Parkway.
We landmark drivers would have been okay if they’d replaced that giant tree with something distinctive like a fire house or a gas station but certainly not another QuickChek which were proliferating back then. I could end up in Philadelphia turning at the wrong QuickCheks.
Map Quest wasn’t much help then either in getting to my daughter’s. When I read “Turn left onto Duffy Street and drive 2.6 miles to Hubschman Avenue,” I’d have my eyes off the road too long reading the odometer and the street signs. An unmistakable visible landmark would be safer. McGinty’s Tavern happens to be on the corner of Duffy and Hubschman, so why not use that as a landmark for the turn? McGinty’s big neon sign would be visible for a half mile.
I have one other navigational tactic for places with no road signs and no roads either. I once discovered a great spot for catching large mouth bass on Lake Hopatcong. It was about a stone’s throw from the east shore. (A young boy on the east shore was throwing stones at me and falling short.)
But how far northeast was I from the boat rental dock? Problem solved. Right after I raised the anchor I began singing “Danny Boy” and rowed southwestward to the dock singing all the way.
If you want to catch those magnificent bass, get a rowboat at the rental place and, keeping one stone’s throw from shore, head northeast singing all four choruses of “Danny Boy”. Then drop your baited hook and expect a fight.
If that’s too confusing, I’d be willing to give more precise directions. You can buy me a beer at McGinty’s. I’m there most Saturday nights.
Imagine That 